His to Break Page 4
“But you’re a doctor. I pay you to listen to my problems.”
With the pen in my hand, I scribble a few names of doctors here in Los Angeles onto my stationary and rip the page from the pad with a loud tear. “That is where you are wrong, Colin. I see no reason why you can’t find a girl to have sex with in person other than your lack of desire to find one. You are perfectly content with getting off to a porn star because you are too afraid to speak to a woman, and there is no medical diagnosis for that. Grow a pair, and your problem will go away. It’s that simple. If you are looking for someone to talk to every week, then I think you are better suited to one of the psychologists on this paper.”
I hand him the list, and he accepts it, keeping his eyes pointed down at the ground. He’s ashamed, and he should be. The fucker wasted both of our times for far too long. I have had enough.
A knock on the door is a welcome relief from the awkwardness in the room. Brittany, my secretary, steps into the room, leaving the door ajar.
“Dr. O’Brien, your next appointment is here,” she says, interrupting the session.
Colin gets up from the couch and blows past Brittany in a huff, his cheeks puffed out in anger. He doesn’t say another word, which suits me just fine.
“About time,” Brittany says with a wicked smile.
I shrug. “You hated Colin.”
“Hate is a strong word. But I am glad to see Colin go. He was wasting your time. Some addicts don’t want help; they just want someone to complain to about their problems.”
After I sit down at my desk, Brittany follows, standing over me. I tap the mouse on my desk and scroll through the software on my computer. “Who’s my next appointment? I don’t see anything on my calendar.”
“It was an emergency. A new patient.” She bites her bottom lip as if she’s keeping something from me.
Brittany leans over me, the scent of her flowery perfume trapped in my nostrils. “I’m here for you if you need anything.”
Glancing up from my computer, I stare at Brittany, confused. “Why are you so cryptic?”
“Because you know him. He’s a doctor.”
Meeting her gaze, I fold my arms across my chest as I sink into the leather chair. As if I wasn’t already a nervous wreck, knowing that Aiden is my next patient makes it hard for me to focus. “Dr. Shaw is here?”
“Yes,” she says, throwing her hands on her hips. “You never told me Dr. Shaw was so good looking.”
“I didn’t think it was important.”
“It’s not often we get Tom Hardy lookalikes in this office.”
“Too bad he doesn’t have a sexy British accent,” I joke, trying to lighten the mood. It doesn’t, at least not for me.
“He would be even hotter if he did.”
“He’s not the kind of man you would want to date.”
“Who said anything about dating him?” She flashes me a wicked smile.
I roll my eyes at her. “Stay away from Dr. Shaw. He’s a patient who needs my help, not some guy you met at a bar.”
“I wish I’d met him at a bar. I would have been all over him.”
I wave my hand to dismiss her. “Stop talking like that and send Dr. Shaw into my office.”
“Yes, Boss,” she says, laughing.
A minute later, Aiden Shaw walks into my office with a devilish grin on his handsome face. My entire body trembles under his intense gaze. Now that we are face-to-face, and not inside a women’s restroom, I can get a better look at Aiden. He always did things to me that I could not explain. And it wasn’t just his looks. It was never about his physical appearance. Aiden commands a presence that everyone around him can feel, a palpable energy that sets my skin on fire.
Aiden closes the door behind him and locks it, before walking over to me. “Scarlett,” he says in a husky voice that causes my nipples to harden.
I suck in a deep breath, terrified of what will come next. “Aiden.”
Scarlett
Aiden Shaw is my new patient. Or at least he will be if I can go through with this session. I told him to make an appointment, and yet I can’t function now that he’s here and in my office. A small part of me never thought he would take me up on my offer.
Aiden was about to fuck some young girl against a dirty bathroom wall before I walked in on them. Seeing him at such a low point and in desperate need of my help, I couldn’t stop myself from taking a business card from my purse. If only he had listened to me three years ago. Things between us could have been much different. Maybe we would be together.
Coming toward me, Aiden checks out my office, staring at every plaque and picture as if he’s studying my life under a microscope. When he’s finished with his appraisal, he locks onto me. His gaze is intense, intimidating. A brush of heat burns beneath my skin that spreads from my cheeks to my chest, warming every part of my body.
Can he see the effect he has on me?
By the look in his deep blue eyes and the cocky smirk on his lips, the answer is yes. Aiden was a different person when I knew him, despite the underlying issues that were always present. The man I once knew was loving and passionate about his career. Now, he’s screwing whores in public bathrooms on his lunch break.
I hold out my hand to the couches in front of the windows and mutter, “Have a seat.”
He nods and walks over to the sitting area without a word.
I want to run. But I won’t. Not when I’m face-to-face with the man I ran away from three years ago. I have to know what Aiden has been up to after all this time. I doubt it’s his addiction.
Back in college, I was falling hard for Aiden. The day he refused my help made all the late nights we’d spent together seem meaningless. All he cared about was his career. And himself. He could have chosen a better life, one that included me. Instead, he withdrew from me and let me go for good.
Aiden Shaw loves himself more than anyone and anything in this world. I learned from experience that his desires come first. Now, I have no idea if he even cares about himself or his career.
I take a seat across from Aiden, unable to take my eyes off him. He leans back against the plush cushions and stretches his arms above his head, drawing my attention to how tight the black oxford fits his arms and hugs his muscular chest. He sucks me in with one look that goes straight between my thighs, killing me without even touching me.
Aiden was always sexy, but now he oozes sex appeal. Before, his dark hair was longer, messier as if styled that way on purpose. Now, it sweeps over his forehead in waves, not a single hair out of place. He’s so manicured and perfect.
I wish I had some confidence in my ability to treat this man. I’m not even sure I can be in the same room as Aiden. Taking him on as a patient would put me in a strange position every week. But I suspect he needs more than the usual treatment plan.
How will I make it through more than one session without wanting to climb onto his lap? Aiden always did strange things to me.
After an awkward silence, Aiden leans forward with his hands on his knees. “Be a good girl and spread your legs for me,” he says, staring at me as if I am a piece of meat.
Well, fuck me.
I slap my thighs together, now even more aware of Aiden’s intentions. There’s no way on earth I will last through the hour without jeopardizing my career. Before we graduated from the Ph.D. program together, I was so close to giving in to my heart and body and saying the hell with Aiden and his demons.
“You are in my office, Aiden,” I remind him because he seems to need one.
“What does that have to do with anything?”
“I will not feed into your addiction, Aiden. If you want me to treat you, I need to know that you are serious about making a change.”
“The only thing I’m serious about is you, Scar.” He licks his lips. “Now, show me what I have been missing.”
“Aiden,” I shout. “You’re even worse now than when we were in college. Are you here to torture me or to seek out treatment for your
sex addiction?”
“A little bit of both. You can heal me, Scarlett. I know you can.”
“Are you willing to work with me?”
“Oh, I am more than willing. You made me an offer five years ago. Do you remember it?”
“How could I forget? You turned me down.”
“I never turned you down. I refused treatment. There’s a difference.”
“I failed to see the distinction.”
“My intentions for you were always clear.”
“Maybe, but you had a problem. I wanted to help you.”
“You wanted to fix me. I’m not some broken toy for you to glue back together.”
“And you wanted to break me,” I counter.
“I still do.”
“I get it,” I say, crossing my legs. “You’re here to get your revenge fuck. I’m a professional, Aiden. You should have known better. If you’re not going to take my program serious, then I don’t see the point in continuing this conversation.”
He holds up his hand to silence me. “That’s enough. You don’t have to spew your psychobabble to me. I’m a doctor, remember?”
It’s shocking how rude he has become. The man I knew was never this cold and arrogant. Well, he was always sure of himself. All smart men are to some extent.
“Then, you should act like one, Dr. Shaw.”
Hearing his title provokes a reaction from Aiden. Clenching his jaw in anger, he sits back and folds his arms over his chest. He throws around the word doctor as if that means anything to me. You have to earn respect, especially in our field, and Aiden lost mine a long time ago. But I would be lying to myself if I didn’t admit that part of me still craves him.
While he’s an arrogant, sex-crazed asshole, he’s also brilliant and charming. Or at least he was when I knew him. Most of the time, his good qualities had outweighed the bad. Now, everything about him feels wrong. So, why am I drawn to him?
Working with Aiden is a mistake. I wish he would leave. Maybe if I push him enough, he will walk away. But I know him well enough to know that he won’t give up.
“Are you going to treat me or what?” He asks the question as if commanding the answer from me. His voice is so deep and controlled, yet soothing to my ears.
I missed Aiden whether I had realized it or not. Just seeing him in my office is digging up memories from the past. If only there were another doctor in this practice who could treat him instead. I am the only doctor who specializes in addiction. Aiden would never admit he has a problem to a complete stranger. With me, he never denied it, which is the same thing.
“Yes,” I say, after a long pause. “I’m afraid our past will hurt our doctor-patient relationship. If you have no concerns and still want to see me, then yes, I can help you. But you have to do what I ask of you. This is not going to be easy for either of us, you especially.”
He stares at my legs for a few seconds, before he peeks up at me from beneath his long, dark lashes. My breath hitches, the nerves caught in my throat in the process. My body is all too aware of every movement Aiden makes. I should send him on his way with a referral to another doctor. If only he would let someone else give him the treatment that he needs.
I was never this uncomfortable, so unsure of myself around Aiden before. He hasn’t said much, though what he has said was inappropriate. The aura he gives off, and his new appearance is throwing me into an emotional tailspin. I shouldn’t want my former colleague and now patient. My thoughts are unprofessional, unethical.
“What does this treatment entail?” He burns a hole through me with his eyes. “You don’t expect me to stop having sex, do you?”
“Are you kidding me, Aiden? If you were a drug addict, would I hand you a bag of cocaine and tell you only to snort one line instead of five?”
“Drug addicts have Methadone and Suboxone to help them detox.”
“Both of those drugs get you high. It’s not a permanent solution. The drugs are not designed for the patient to take them for the rest of their life.”
“I know how they work, Scar.”
“Dr. O’Brien,” I spit back.
I have to remind him that I am the doctor in this office.
He blows out a puff of air. “Whatever, Dr. O’Brien. You get my point, don’t you?”
“Yes, I do, but you are missing the point I was trying to make. Just like drug addiction, we have to wean you off.”
“Sex is a normal part of life. How do you expect me to have a relationship with anyone if I can’t have sex?”
I laugh. “You? Have a relationship? That was a good one, Aiden.”
“Why do you think I’m here?” He growls the words. “I’m here for you, Scarlett, and only you. I believed in you back then, and I believe in you now. And you will be mine.”
This conversation is getting a bit too intense for our first session. Aiden is so dominant and in control that I cower under his gaze. And I hate that it turns me on.
He stares at me intently, studying ever feature from my face down to my chest. Once his eyes land on my breasts, he licks his lips again. He knows I am watching his every movement, yet he does something incredibly unprofessional on purpose.
“I think we should cut this appointment short and pick up another day,” I say, sitting up straight.
“How about tomorrow?”
Leaning back in my chair, I uncross my legs, thinking over my next response. “I’ll have to check my schedule.”
He eyes up my bare thighs for a few more seconds before he presses his palms to the cushions and leans forward. When Aiden looks at you, it’s as if he’s staring through you, trying to extract all your secrets hidden deep inside. It’s intense.
I was nervous when he first strolled into my office. Now, my body is on fire, excited and terrified by the idea of working with Aiden again. I loved our late night chats about psychology and what makes people tick back in college. So, I can only assume that we will go back to the way things were in the past. Or at least I hope they will. Therapy could be a fresh start for both of us, a way to get to know each other again, and for me to see if I what saw five years ago is still there between us.
Aiden stands up and runs his hands down the front of his slacks, bringing my attention to his…erection. Maybe my undersexed mind is imagining things.
“Aiden,” I say, clearing my throat. “We will have a problem if you get aroused by our appointments.”
“I’m hard,” he says, unaffected. “No big deal. You have a particular effect on me. I can’t guarantee this won’t happen again. In fact, I know it will.”
I swallow the lump in my throat.
It has been far too long since I have had what I would call good sex. What Aiden and I had years ago was explosive, like two live wires creating a perfect charge. He didn’t even have to touch me to provoke a reaction. While I’m looking forward to seeing what sparks between us this time, I am also terrified of him.
Holding onto the arm of the chair, I push myself up to my feet, a little wobbly in these heels. I had no time break them in before I removed them from the box this morning. It also doesn’t help that Aiden causes my entire body to tremble from the nervous anticipation of what is to come.
I extend my hand to Aiden, attempting to keep this somewhat professional. “Have a good night, Dr. Shaw.”
“It would be better if the night ended with you naked and in my bed.” He reaches out, clasping my hand in his, and brings it up to his lips, sending chills down my spine in the process.
Aiden stares at me the entire time he does this, acutely aware of the effect he has on me. My panties are soaking wet, the thin lace barely enough to keep my juices from spilling down my leg. He shouldn’t have this power over me.
While Aiden can’t see the magic he’s working on me, he can see my nipples protruding through the silky blue fabric of my top. They’re like daggers pointed at him. And he doesn’t miss a thing.
When was the last time I was this turned on? It has been so long since
Mark made me feel the way Aiden does right now.
“I will enjoy working with you, Dr. O’Brien.” He leans down to whisper in my ear, causing my skin to dot with tiny bumps. “You’re not fooling anyone but yourself. You want me. I want you. And I will have you by the time we are through. Do you understand?”
The way he says it sounds like an order. I stop breathing for a second, the lack of oxygen making my head spin. Before I can get in another word, he releases me from his grip and walks away from me.
Aiden opens the door and spins around to look at me once more. “Goodnight, Scarlett.”
“Goodnight, Dr. Shaw,” I choke out.
“I will think of you when my hand is wrapped around my cock tonight. Sweet dreams.” He winks at me and then closes the door behind him.
At this rate, I won’t last another second around Aiden. I should be leery of his intentions, but I want to explore the raw and unfiltered side of Aiden Shaw. He will be my greatest challenge. Most of all, Aiden might be my greatest weakness.
Aiden
For hours, I surfed the Internet for the latest porn, searching for women who resembled Scarlett. I watched countless videos, all with girls who reminded me of Scarlett in some way. Some girls had the same blonde hair that sweeps over her shoulders, while others had the same long, toned legs that I dream of having wrapped around me. A few women had nice, perky tits that left me fantasizing about shoving my face between Scarlett’s breasts. I could not get Scarlett out of my mind after I’d left her office.
I had my secretary make the appointment with every intention to get the revenge fuck that Scarlett knew I wanted. Now, I want more than rough sex. I want her. In more ways than one. She threw me so off my game that I had Erica cancel my morning appointments so that I could stay home and take care of what her presence had done to me. Nothing has worked.
It’s as if Scarlett is my special blend of Viagra. I have a sickness I don’t even bother to hide or deny. With Scarlett showing up after all these years, it only makes things worse for me. My dick has been hard since I walked out of her office. No matter how many times I jerk off, I cannot get this never-ending erection to go away. She could fix it; I know she could. That was why I went to see Scarlett in the first place. She’s the problem and the cure.